My Beloved Children,
Mother’s Day is a day when as a mother, I wait in anticipation for that validation from you that I’ve done my job well. I expect to be treated as a queen for the day, chauffeured to a restaurant to feast at my heart’s content. I read the cards with all the nice words that praise me, but beneath all the masquerade, I’m left with the reality and truth of what my role as your mother has been to you, whom God has entrusted in my care.
I want you to know that I don’t wait for Mother’s Day, to ask God to search my heart to show me where I’ve failed you and to ask your forgiveness. You’ve heard the old adage that a child is born without a manual. Well the only book of life to guide me along the way has been the Bible, a book which at one time seemed to me as a foreign movie needing much interpretation. By the time I realized it’s value and that God’s Word was meant as a sword for protection for me and you, my love; by the time I learned how to pick up the sword and wield and use it, I had left a string of casualties in the wake of my efforts. Unfortunately, you were among those casualties, you my dear whom I dearly wished to protect.
I ask you to forgive me for those times I failed to protect you
I ask your forgiveness for the times I fought against you like you were the enemy
Forgive me for believing the enemy’s lie that you were truly the adversary
Forgive me for forgetting you are my child and not a monster out to get me
I ask your forgiveness for those times when you really needed a friend to understand but instead I put on the disciplinarian hat
I ask your forgiveness for those times I made you feel alone and abandoned or made you believe I had turned my back on you
Forgive me for giving up on you instead of brandishing my sword on your behalf
But know that in all these misgivings, when I didn’t know what to do . . .
I never once stopped praying for you
I never stopped asking God to reach out to you when I couldn’t
Never stopped pleading for God to touch you, to help you understand that . . .
I myself am fighting to stay strong and stand firm so that we can find our way home.
By Arama Christiana
Stay Blessed!
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